samzimms 1960 G 5m
You're just going to have to tell him. "Some of your habits are a real turn-off and I need you to up your hygiene game. If you want to be intimate, you need to keep things clean and fresh. I do the same for you. I can't be intimate with someone who isn't clean."
Then, he has a choice of how to respond. Hopefully he'll take it to heart and get it together.
throwaway726274292 634 8m
This is such a great way to word it, I think this may get through to him! He gets home in a few hours so I’ll see what happens
hunting_snipes 358 3h58m
I'm gonna need an update on his reaction ASAP op
odie4200 49 4h49m
Seconded… update needed!!
fuzzballsoflove 21 5h0m
Waits for update
Keykitty1991 17 5h12m
I read this as seasoned and yes he definitely seems to be seasoned...🙃
hunting_snipes 3 5h22m
That's what I call the water when my dog drinks it straight out of the toilet bowl. She prefers it seasoned. Maybe OP's hubby does too. She might want to ask more questions
Unique-Yam 1 5h26m
Yeah, and not in a good way. 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢
Corfiz74 146 2h25m
Yeah, telling him his nether regions stink like the pits from hell and make you wanna puke would probably be the wrong way to put it. 🙈 Good luck!
Atlas7674 33 4h10m
His nether regions are around as appetizing as the nether
Stinkytheferret 26 5h2m
And showers for both prior to gettin down or it’s a no go. Simply ask him when he’s taking his shower. “Did you take your shower?” “Have you taken your shower yet?” “So you’re not going to shower? ok Gnight.”
I wouldn’t say mine has the same issue but I don’t care. Hygiene is important. And, remember, introducing bacteria to your lady parts isn’t good. Yeah. No go.
Mundane-Currency5088 22 4h26m
Up side is that I have found that men who are naturally monogamous and very few partners in their life are pretty gross hygiene wise. Men who have lots of partners are meticulously clean everywhere in my experience.
Bighippie7408 8 4h43m
I was thinking this is probably a correct hypothesis but the dirtiest dude I know has had sex with more than 100 women.
Orianaro 13 5h1m
I'm the first gf of my bf and he is and always has been impeccably clean, with himself and stuff. I don't think there's a strong trend either way, just some dudes who sleep around a lot remember STDs exist and everyone else just does whatever they would naturally do, until maybe someone kicks up a fuss that no, I'm not putting my face in expired sweat lice-ville for those that need it. Sounds like OPs hubby needs it.
Lenins_Kittens 6 5h12m
This is dumb as f*ck
Also the biggest puss*hounds I knew had quite...questionable hygeine
PeppermintLNNS 3 5h11m
Not sure I would equate morality with “very few partners” necessarily but I get what you’re saying.
Mundane-Currency5088 7 5h22m
I said nothing about morality monogamy doesn't make anyone more virtuous.
Sharp-Refrigerator85 1 4h14m
Goodluck OP!! I wish you the response you want!
BlakeNeverflake 1 5h15m
Hope this works out for you 😞 bad hygiene is awful although wait till you have someone that snores the second they sleep 🤣 better be able to afford a two bedroom
Dogslug 1 5h21m
Ask him how he would like it if you didn't wipe when you pissed and left it all there to marinate for him to go down on later.
Sheeps_n_Birds 1 5h38m
Don't be afraid to direct. He give a sh*t about that you should like off his old piss of his dick. This is so disrespectful. He can get you a serious infection by putting his crusty dick in you. At some point you should dtop dancing around his feelings.
pelliesbruv 1 5h46m
Haha “up your hygiene game”.
You’re right though. Dudes love anything that’s framed as a sport.
justtuna 0 5h6m
As a dude it’s kinda hard to get the last drips out. I did learn that if you press just under the ball sack there is a tube in there that the pee goes through when you press it it causes it to straighten or something and the rest of the drops come out.
I’m not gunna lie I’ve had an itch and scratched and sniffed I just want to make sure I don’t stink down there. I mean how else are you gunna know. I also wash my hands after I do that as well.
shawcphet1 1292 2h15m
Every dude reading this: 😳
Appropriate_Rope2739 196 3h32m
This made me laugh so hard. Sorry op your post is a serious issue but shawcphett1 cracked me up. Thank you
shawcphet1 98 3h34m
Appreciate it lol. OP if you read this I as well didn’t mean to make light of your issue. I agree it is super gross when you really think about it.
throwaway726274292 99 3h43m
No honestly your comment made me laugh so hard 😂
Stinkytheferret 12 5h3m
Right, stale piss remnants in your mouth? Gtfo
ThinkThankThonk 134 4h38m
This post should give lonely dudes hope, because the bar is absolutely on the floor
Altruistic-Trip9218 84 5h4m
Pretty much at least once a week there's a post about "how do I get my bf/husband to wipe his ass?" You can be literally caked in sh*t and still get a BF/GF.
For most people the issue is not the bar others have for them, but the bar they have for others. Lower your bar to "sh*t caked is okay" and you too can have a boyfriend or girlfriend.
Wu-TangClam 11 5h7m
Oh honey if he's not rolling turd balls he picked out of his butt hair and flicking them across the room before sex, the floor is well below us.
Mundane-Currency5088 88 4h28m
Yes! Hey Guys!! Please get in between the balls and the leg, wash your ass, floss your teeth (gently and regularly) and gently brush your tongue.
SpicyThunderThighs 79 4h30m
This makes me never want to be sexual with a man again, ugh.
lambam0ngwolves 47 4h37m
Me too. They sound like walking UTIs
MiIkTank 42 5h14m
We aren’t all pissbeard McGee over here haha
erinnotaarondamnit 18 5h30m
Bacterial vaginosis dispensers
Kipapuro 7 5h21m
No no, it doesn't have to be that way dear, they're good guys. For example, where I come from it's a strict tradition to wash your private parts with water after finishing the business at WC. I am not claiming this practice is the best or something as one might claim this isn't sustainable use of water and hygiene depends on the person I guess, yet I find our practice cool every time I go down on someone as they don't smell pee or something, and OP will be out of trouble if it was that way. Yet we have our sh*t with regards to hygiene, plus it's a personal issue
pjorter 59 3h29m
The trick is doing it when no one sees it.
odie4200 5 4h53m
Damn, (closes curtains)
Soul_Traitor 18 4h59m
Lol I shower everyday and wash down there before sexy time. I think it's courteous, especially if I think I'm going to get oral. It's the least I could do.
shawcphet1 5 5h4m
I do both of those as well, but definitely don’t wipe after I pee and I bee scratching my balls
mandark1171 0 5h14m
but definitely don’t wipe after I pee
For men you have to becareful our junk isnt designed the same way as women's it can actually cause irritation and abrasion on the urethra for men if they wipe, its medically recommend to either shake or dab
Edit: love being downvoted for literally just saying the same sh*t Dr. Alex Shteynshlyuger, the Director of Urology atNew York Urology Specialists said... its almost like its less about the science and more about emotions
illarionds 1 5h33m
That is absolute nonsense. You don't scrub it, but a gentle wipe is absolutely not going to do any damage.
nat_nattt 1 5h41m
Nah then you just get toilet paper stuck to the tip of your dick
SladeWilsonXL9 6 4h33m
Chill, I don’t do that
shawcphet1 23 4h33m
Sorry for embarrassing you in front of everybody
SladeWilsonXL9 -6 5h5m
Not embarrassed, just don’t make general statements when you don’t have the evidence or research to back it up
odie4200 5 4h51m
Your comment is true though I don’t care how clean you are!!
throwaway726274292 316 17m
I think part of the problem is I haven’t really sat down and had a real conversation with him about it and how much it grosses me out, I think instead of just making passive comments go over his head. Thank you guys for the advice I’ll keep you updated!
RadioSupply 120 1h12m
Yeah, you need to spell it out in a kind way, like, “Babe, I need to talk to you, and I wish I knew the easiest way to talk about it, but…” and tell him what you told us here - you’d prefer that he wash his face and body more often, you don’t want to see him scratch ‘n sniff, and when you’re intimate like kissing and sex you need him to wash up and brush his teeth.
Mundane-Currency5088 35 4h31m
He wouldn't need to scratch if he was clean and dry he probably has jock itch and needs treatment. Which means he can get OP sick too.
RadioSupply 8 4h54m
The best cure for athlete’s foot and jock itch is to be clean and dry. It’s so easy. All he needs is water, soap, towels, and a hair dryer on a regular basis and none of this would be a problem.
scaly_friends_4me 70 2h26m
A 28 year old man shouldn't need to be told any of this. There's a mich bigger problem at play here than you just not having had a conversation about it. He should know how to maintain proper hygiene!
The next time you go near his dick and it's nasty, say "omg your dick stinks. When was the last time you showered?"
ForayIntoFillyloo 20 3h57m
Maybe before saying something like that think for a moment how it would feel if your partner were to say that to you. Phrasing is the difference between a conversation and an argument sometimes.
scaly_friends_4me 18 4h34m
If my guy put his face down there and almost threw up because it smelled that bad, I absolutely would not expect him to be nice about it. There's no excuse for that. I wash up after using the bathroom if I think there's any chance of anything happening soon, because I don't want there to be any bad taste or smells. It's basic hygiene to make sure your genitals are clean. Even without a partner, letting it get dirty there is asking for an infection.
TaintedRealiti 8 5h1m
OP has already told him multiple times to clean himself. At some point, being nice is no longer an option. In Jamaica we have a phrase that goes "Who don't hear, will feel."
skwerldom 4 5h4m
Do we wash our dishes and utensils because we are going to put them in our mouths? Then it stands to reason we wash what someone else might put their mouth on. No need to be delicate.
ForayIntoFillyloo 0 5h10m
Never said anything about not needing to wash. My point is that one can be direct without being inflammatory. Imagine if ole Dirty Dong went down on OP and said "omg your puss* reeks...".
skwerldom 5h14m
Again, if they washed, it wouldn't unless they were ill. And if it were true, they might feel just as alarmed. I just see these posts all the time here and they are usually about people just not washing.
Character-Remote7354 12 3h48m
I think you're on to something about a much bigger problem. It just occurred to me reading your thing, that poor hygiene can be one of the signs of depression.
halpthehalpless 18 4h11m
Umm…. I’ve been maniacally depressed since I was a young child and it has ruled my outlook and life for decades. I feel like it has doomed me to live out my days alone, unloved, and pathetic. That said, my junk is squeaking f*cking clean.
Character-Remote7354 6 4h41m
I'm sorry that you have to struggle in that way. Glad to hear that you can manage your cleanliness so well. I was diagnosed with PTSD and depression and was medically released from the military. The year and a half after that my social interactions, hygiene, and overall enthusiasm for life took a nose dive. Learned that there was no 'cure' to get rid of my depression. All I could do was learn to manage it. So far I've been mostly successful!
scaly_friends_4me 13 4h27m
If he's so depressed that he's letting his junk smell so bad his wife almost vomited, then he absolutely needs to be in some serious treatment for it.
Character-Remote7354 1 4h48m
Any level of depression should be addressed, 'if' that is the case. If not, then he's just a lazy pig-pen.
Mundane-Currency5088 8 4h34m
Hmm. I know a number of really great guys that I would have loved to keep dating but I get infections from unhygienic people. They were pretty angry when I talked about it and sad and shocked when I left the relationship. I said I could send them the doctor bills...I had already spent over $600 on one guy after all the different antibiotics and antifungal medications
scaly_friends_4me 10 4h40m
You may just have finicky bacteria. I had a boyfriend that was very particular about his hygiene but I still got a UTI every single time we had sex (which is not normal for me). I'm talking bad, like peeing actual blood clots. I went to the doctor thinking he gave me some weird disease. She said I didn't have anything, and sometimes two people's bacteria just don't mesh well. I only ever had that happen with him, but maybe your bacteria is more easily upset?
Although fungal is another problem entirely....
Mundane-Currency5088 1 5h21m
I got both Bacterial Vaginosis and Yeast which I should have said instead of fungal. But it's the same treatment.
Turtle4hire 5 3h36m
Not everyone knows about good personal hygiene and what it is
hunting_snipes 18 4h3m
u/throwaway726274292 this is very true, I grew up almost literally a feral child. My mom has mental health issues and worked nights and really just left my sister and I to fend for ourselves. I am thirty-two and there are still social mores that I am not aware of. I do gross things that I am not aware of. I really appreciate it when people tell me.
Even I know that what you described is gross though. I don't think it necessarily belies a bigger problem. Direct communication is best-- "Babe, I love you, but if you want some sugar you're gonna need to tidy up" and spell out exactly your standards of clean. It doesn't need to be a big sit down "Babe we need to talk.." as others suggested. I think in this case, being extremely blunt is actually kind of funny and helps make it known you're serious without making things heavy or tense.
Haunted_Backdoor 14 3h52m
I am assuming he didn't used to be like this or OP wouldn't have married him
Keykitty1991 2 5h22m
They may not have had sex before marriage or lived together prior so it wasn't so concerning or obvious.
Mundane-Currency5088 24 4h30m
I get really sick if my partners aren't clean. O e partner gave me Yeast, BV, strep throat, and a urinary tract infection all at the same time. Soap just made the smells angry.
katwithak82 9 4h58m
That sounds f*cking awful.
Mundane-Currency5088 6 5h23m
It was. I broke up with him and got better. Then 3 mother later tried again and boom
throwRAelky 8 5h25m
I currently have a UTI, STI, and PID thanks to a cheating ex. I feel your pain.
Fun-jellyfish22 2 5h20m
Omg
SportsFan242 21 31m
Yup, gotta be honest and direct
ForayIntoFillyloo 47 3h52m
Ummm, how shall I phrase this delicately but directly? Ah, I know...honey, YO DICK TASTE LIKE sh*t. SUCK IT YOURSELF.
ResistAlternative935 3 5h14m
Hahaha "here's your tenga egg, enjoy"
uncreative_kid 3 4h34m
yes good luck! communication is key. cause otherwise you could be like me every time you get intimate - i gave oral to a guy with stinky dick and two days later i was in urgent care for strep throat/bacterial infection 🤮
skwerldom 1 5h1m
Yeah, just make sure he knows how UNsexy it is and how it is hard to have feelings of desire for him when he is about to touch you and you flash on that scene of him pulling his hands out of his pants and sniffing them, then going on about his day.
Altruistic-Trip9218 1 5h5m
Is this a new problem, in which case you should consider the possibility of depression. Or did you just marry a piss soaked dude and expect that to magically change?
Stinkytheferret 1 5h5m
When you cut him off of any extra curricular activities, he’s gonna listen or do you have one of those guys who just doesn’t?
finalfx 1 5h45m
Passive comments will do more damage than good (don’t ask how I know). You need to have a direct and honest conversation. God speed.
elkomanderJOZZI -23 2h31m
Yeah Instead of having a real conversation you decide to have a fake conversation online lololol
raichiha 9 4h5m
She consulted a third party (Reddit) for opinions on the best way to have that conversation, not “have a fake conversation online” as an alternative. First day here?
elkomanderJOZZI -7 4h21m
Not quite, been around the block 😉 & honestly this sub tends to be bias af lol
GetOffMyLawn1975 249 1h55m
Having a little drip of pee come out after urinating is pretty normal. Even if you dab with TP, a drop can still come out.I honestly don't know of any men that make it a regular habit of dabbing the tip of their penis with toilet paper after they pee. It's usually just a lot of shaking.
Now, the reaching his hand down his pants to scratch himself and sniff it in front of you, that's pretty gross. He should knock that off ASAP.
Balls & taint do get gamey throughout the day. If he expects to put your nose anywhere near his cash & prizes and actually not be repulsed by it, he needs to maintain the area & give it a quick cleanup before sex. It's just common courtesy.
PhiloBeddoe4319 75 2h22m
Cash & prizes lol
ames2833 9 4h1m
Right?? I’m gonna start calling it that now 😂😂
ohansen84 2 4h52m
Dane Cook used it in his stand-up specials quite a bit. Still hilarious.
Altruistic-Trip9218 7 5h6m
As a dude that dabs unless I'm in public and the stalls are nasty so I use a urinal, I feel like this is more than the drop you get from not dabbing. It sounds like he's one of those dudes who barely shakes and stuffs it back in, and has giant yellow stains around his dong in his undies.
StGir1 45 3h17m
I was going to ask this. I’ve never watched a guy pee. So I didn’t know what they did.
But not washing (goes for both) before oral, especially at the end of a long day, is just 🤮
GetOffMyLawn1975 21 3h22m
Yeah, agreed! Another person is putting their face in your genitals. The LEAST you can do is make sure it's clean and presentable.
IDontLieAboutStuff 26 2h27m
Amen dude. I this thread makes me worried about the level of general knowledge demonstrated by some of these people offering others life advice.
Anna_S_1608 6 4h5m
Some manscaping can help as well.
GetOffMyLawn1975 6 4h13m
YES!! The hair can hold on to smell, so keeping it trimmed is important
tinynecrodancer 219 3h30m
Okay here's where there is a disconnect for me: Most men shake and go and don't smell like urine. There's something more at play here. Either he doesn't fully wash himself when he showers and doesn't understand body hygiene (made worse of he's uncircumcised or sweats a ton and doesn't care for his skin) or he's wearing the same dirty undies for days in a row. The other possibility is that his pee is really extra smelly, which might mean he needs to drink more water and see a urologist.
thebigtreeinmyyard 40 5h0m
I wonder if he doesn’t even shake it and just shoves it in his boxers with drops still present on the tip.
UnholyPants 27 5h11m
Yeah I was wondering if he’s one of those guys who think washing your own ass is ‘gay’ because of gasp putting your hand in between the cheeks or something
RemoteHippo 13 5h19m
There are people who think that ? Wtaf
ultimateworm 14 5h19m
Yeah…. Men usually just shake and go and don’t have urine everywhere/smell of it. If he is uncircumcised he needs to be washing thoroughly.
mandark1171 2 5h20m
It honestly sounds like either he's doing less than what we are thinking (not shaking, not soaping up, etc) or she maybe a bit of a germaphobe and general clean isn't enough for her
fsenerc123 -52 5h6m
The other (likely imo 🌚) possibility is she’s being a bitch
DaisyBellBaby 36 5h11m
Found the man that doesn’t wash
polaroidbilder 33 5h10m
Just wash your dick, dude
Thewallinthehole 21 5h12m
How could you say that about somebody who's disgusted about being intimate with someone who lacks basic hygiene habits?
Dogslug 6 5h25m
wow ur so ~cool and edgy~
Oldexperianced 165 3h30m
“If you want sex you’re going to have to keep yourself clean”
“And if you want me to suck your 🍆 then it better be clean and freshly washed.
First_Rose_Princess 113 3h10m
Wow. The bar for men is so f*cking low
Redqueenhypo 21 4h4m
“Wash your hands and junk” is apparently too high a standard…if that’s true, I’m staying single. At least I know where my hands have been (the bag of takis)
chica_3176 2 4h59m
I’ve heard a lot of men say it’s “gay” to clean their ass and wipe their dick off. Honestly, they’re a walking UTI and don’t even know it. It’s quite gross. It’s the single life for me.
Altruistic-Trip9218 2 5h25m
"a lot"? I've seen it, but I've seen a much higher number of flat earthers. It happens, but lets not pretend it's a significant portion of men.
Ratzing- -1 5h26m
You really heard a LOT of men say this? What kind of friends and acquaintances do you have in god's name? Im a guy, we talk a lot about stupid stuff and have never once heard a person utter such ridiculous idea.Also, it's a valid choice to be single but women don't all get UTI instantly after getting into a relationship. But again, maybe case of your peculiar choice in people you know.
knittedjedi 19 4h47m
Yup. "I don't want to be intimate with someone who tastes of piss" shouldn't be a conversation you have in a marriage 😂
AnduinIsAZombie 0 5h30m
Women are capable of being disgusting and unhygienic as well. I don't understand why we need to turn this into a battle of the sexes.
irockguitar -42 3h49m
You're a sad miserable, angry divorcee and it shows.
EDIT: Does that get me more downvotes?
farel85 17 3h57m
I'm pretty sure you're single and smell like ball sweats.
irockguitar -12 4h5m
You're wrong, but that's a sweet assumption :)
farel85 1 4h6m
I aim to please.
irockguitar -1 4h7m
Just only the clean ones!
farel85 1 4h11m
Indeed. A clean whistle is a happy serviced whistle.
ChirpsMcPrime 95 3h24m
Sometimes people just need a straight:
You gotta shower.
Redjo52 65 2h36m
No matter how much you shake or dance the last few drops drips on your pants..
Aggressive_Froyo1246 12 4h14m
So use a bit of toilet paper to get the last drip maybe?
Padfoot141 24 4h22m
The last drip doesn't always happen instantly, sometimes it's as late as minutes after you've put it away. More like a leak than a drip.
thisismyrealnamekz 13 4h26m
It don't work like that, there can be none left on the tip, but when you put it away most of the time some drips out. Can't help it
GameofPorcelainThron 8 5h27m
The last drip isn't dangling off the end of the penis. Oftentimes it's still inside and won't actually come out until you've moved around a bit. Even if I squeeze down at the base and try to get it out like a tube of old toothpaste, there will often be an extra drip that's hiding up there like Saddam Hussein in that dirt hole.
p0mphius 4 4h32m
Its not like that
DirtyMudder92 1 4h21m
Doesn’t work because dudes urethra is like u curved so after tucking yourself back in and walking around the pee can spurt out from some weird angle. You’d have to put on like a maxipad for 15 minutes after peeing to really catch the last drops
Lucian952 -5 4h29m
Almost never happens to me, seems like my penis is built different
SirCoughsAlot_ 64 1h21m
As a man, I appreciate when my wife doesn’t tiptoe around hard subjects. It’s taken her a few years to get comfortable with it. I feel like most of us hate tiptoeing around the bullsh*t and want to get straight to the point.
My advice: tell it to him straight, his hygiene is a turn off and you need him to take better care of himself.
CurvyKitten81 9 3h16m
If I find a subject difficult to discuss i write it down in a notebook for my SO. He says he prefers that to me holding things in.
AuroraBlue6 9 3h25m
This is SO important. None of us, of any gender or in any type of relationship, are able to change when we aren’t told there is an issue because someone isn’t comfortable going bringing it up. Friends, colleagues, spouses, whatever - if we want something to work out, we need to speak up about whatever it is so the person has a chance to decide to change it decided nope, not worth it.
Being passive aggressive isn’t clear to the person and isn’t really giving the person a good faith opportunity to understand how we feel and change, compromise, or refuse. And saying nothing means we let things that bother us bubble until we boil over while the other person is oblivious to what’s going on.
Communication with respect and compassion is key.
TieWebb 44 40m
“When he pees he just shakes it off and puts his underwear back on.” Is there some other step? What else would he do?
Phteven_j 27 43m
Insufficient shaking if pee is making it everywhere.
StGir1 3 3h18m
Or if he’s having incontinence issues. Which may be why he’s sniffing his junk all damned day too.
lituranga 24 2h3m
From reddit I have learned that many men need to do a little pressing to get those last few drops off without having them leak into their underwear after so for the love of god why wouldn't you do that if you were leaving pee in your underwear on the daily.
Crethusela 6 3h11m
It’s not that easy. You can shake and squeeze for 30 seconds and still not get it all
Generally easier when you are sitting down, however
dutchman76 3 3h26m
sitting down makes it worse for me, the second i stand up, even more comes out.
farel85 8 4h0m
I've heard rubbing the taint for a sec may make that last drop appear. Or do a shake and fake out with your dick - like pretend to tuck it away and whip it back out like haah I got ya mothaf*cker!
5yn3rgy 5 4h37m
This comment made me laugh out loud, thank you :)
"I got ya mothaf*cker!"
kayaedengreen 1 4h40m
Loving this.
Fun-jellyfish22 1 5h27m
This legit made me laugh
Nat6LBG 2 4h51m
So true, Honestly I couldn't care less about this but for the love of God why don't they shower before the stuff??
dutchman76 2 4h59m
I don't get it either, I'm always trying to be careful of how I smell.
Street_Passage_1151 24 2h37m
My bf squeezes his dick like a tube of Go-Gurt 🤷
JoMamma_80 14 3h28m
So does my husband- and guess what? He never EVER stinks like piss, lol! I bet yours doesn’t either!
Street_Passage_1151 1 5h18m
Haha yeah! Mine doesn't either!!
CurvyKitten81 4 3h2m
Interesting
Johnnyring0 2 3h33m
lolllll
Past-time29 1 5h29m
my ex partner of 10 yrs does this too and never smells.
ZoinProXi 6 2h50m
I don’t know but I find this hilarious. I laughed so much.
aj6787 5 4h0m
My initial thought is that OP’s husband has health issues if there is enough pee for it to smell or if the pee is that potent that you can smell it.
Is OP inhaling the crotch areas of the underwear? This is all so confusing. The scratching crotch thing is gross but you’re lying if you’ve never done it.
5yn3rgy 3 4h38m
Yeah, people may occasionally do that but they don't do it around others. It's like picking your nose, lol
aj6787 2 5h4m
Lol my wife and I do those things around each other… 🥺
5yn3rgy 2 5h18m
Well, if it works for you guys then do your thing :)
roygbev 3 3h11m
My ex always dabbed with TP.
eldenchain 2 4h5m
I have never known a single dude in the whole world who has done this. Shaking should be sufficient. Bathing never hurts either!
bigjack78 1 4h53m
Weird
Cutiebeautypie 1 4h52m
Wash it
flowerscandrink 0 4h21m
He needs to learn the taint maneuver. Reach under your balls where the taint is and press firmly. This will expel any urine that is still in the chamber and prevent leakage later. Dabbing with toilet paper is absolutely useless and conveys a misunderstanding of male anatomy.
throwaway726274292 -4 51m
Use a square of TP to fully wipe it off to prevent drippage, or even put a little square in his underwear so the drips dont spread to his underwear
TieWebb 28 1h10m
That’s not how it works. Have you ever been to a mens room? There will be many urinals with no toilet paper anywhere near them and like one stall. In my forty years I have never once seen a guy take a piss then go over to the stall for toilet paper.
LichtTheLost 22 1h33m
Lmao ikr?! Im freakin laughing my ass off sooooo hard. I was hella confused by what she wrote in the initial post. I was like “have i been missing a step these past 25 years?!”
justtolearn123 1 4h19m
OP just sounds neurotic. I actually do use a piece of toilet paper on my penis when I know I'm getting a blowj*b soonish, but I feel like OP just realized that men don't use toilet paper to get the last drop of pee off their penis, and has it in her head that his penis is disgusting now. I feel like most men have smelt some pee on a woman assuming that your sense of smell is decent, but it's not really something that's overpowering or that terrible if you're not neurotic about it.
mrzmckoy 21 1h53m
Hahaha I'm gonna tell my hubby he has to start putting a little t.p. hat on it 😂😂😂😂
JoMamma_80 7 3h28m
One of the little “pee pee teepees” they sell for baby boys! Yes!
DeepFriedFeelings4 3 3h44m
I am picturing something similar the sombrero cap on a bottle of Sierra tequila when you say that.
PartOfTheTree 10 3h11m
If you have a dick that needs a wipe/dab after peeing, go pee in the stalls or keep some kleenex in your pocket
TrboThotRoboCop 9 3h18m
So what you're telling anyone whose never used a men's room is; there's like 10 guys all in a line, shoulder to shoulder, shaking their junk around? How much shaking is permitted before it gets weird?
aj6787 1 3h58m
I think an old pop band made a lyric about that. But yes this is basically what a men’s bathroom is. With everyone looking straight ahead or down to make sure zero eye contact happens.
bigjack78 1 4h54m
We don't care what each other does.
Ormolus 1 5h39m
2 shakes is fine, 3 and you're playing with yourself.
femmeshepp 3 1h33m
So what's his excuse for when he's at home and the toilet paper is plentiful? It's bare minimum to dab your tip with a square of toilet paper.
coolelel 6 2h21m
It doesn't really do anything though :/
The remaining bit of the pee is more in the Uretha then the tip
femmeshepp 3 2h26m
If this was as hopeless of a cause as you all in this thread were making it out to be, then the vast majority of people with penises would stink in their underwear. My fiancé adequately shakes and uses a square after taking a piss, so whatever is leftover in the S-shaped urethra afterwards is miniscule and undetected in his underwear anyway. It's not that hard.
lituranga 16 3h1m
Exactly this. Why are so many men in this thread acting as it's inevitable that you will stink like pee all day because there's nothing you can possibly do about these last drops. I have never dated a man whose crotch and underwear smell like piss all the time
cmikailli 6 3h53m
Which should be a sign to you that the smell and the pee-drip aren’t related and that OP is wrongly associating the two because the overwhelming evidence is that this is normal penis behavior
uniquehumannotabot 5 4h21m
Going to guess that if it has that strong of a smell something medical is off, or they are dehydrated more often than not.
coolelel 10 2h43m
I mean, a single drop of pee doesn't smell that much lmao
femmeshepp 7 3h6m
I know, that's what I'm saying! If OP's dude's junk smells that bad, he might as well just piss in his boxers 😭
Babydoll0907 2 3h35m
Right. My ex and I were together for 12 years and my husband and I have been together almost 7 and I've never ever smelled piss on them of their underwear.
superfuntime83 -2 3h48m
Can I have your bf email address cuz holy hell he needs to leave your crazy ass! /s wtf kinda bs is this I’d say 99% of men aren’t going to do that lmao
BruisedKidneys 18 3h14m
I don't know why this is such a strange idea for people. Men say it's not going to help because some pee will still dribble out afterwards. I have incontinence issues and the same thing happens to me, and what do I do? Get back on the toilet, clean up, and then change my underwear if needed. It's not hard.
obeseskydiver1 12 1h51m
Like others are saying, that isn't how it works. I've never once wiped my penis after taking a leak. I don't think i've ever met someone who has.
NOW if he isn't finishing pissing completely and is just outright pissing himself, that is a different situation.
lituranga 9 2h3m
If you regularly dripped multiple drops of pee into your boxers after every time you peed I would hope to god you did though
obeseskydiver1 3 2h51m
That might be another issue though. He could have to see a doctor about him having accidental leakage.
OP should have a conversation with her husband instead of making passive comments like it has been stated in other comments.
farel85 1 4h2m
Maybe he just doesn't change his shorts every day? 🤮
tinynecrodancer 8 3h24m
I hear you. I think ultimately, OP is saying that he needs an extra step because the shake is inadequate. If you were walking around smelling like urine all day, I'm sure you'd problem solve, right? That's what this post is for.
Lifekraft 2 2h15m
I do sometime but no matter what the last drop is for my underwear.
Obligation425 5 2h15m
Actually u can clean It with paper when u done, Just shaking it like the guys are saying is wrong, and you can with your finger press the canal where the piss goes to make the lasts drops Go out and clean it too
RPTA9000 -1 1h1m
Hahahahahahaha
IDontLieAboutStuff -2 2h20m
Did you steal this from the league?? Does he need a pee bib?
crisp1991 -4 2h12m
Are you 12?
TieWebb -5 3h55m
brb I’m going to tell my wife how I feel she should be using a tampon. I’ll let you know what she says.
brn I’m going to tell my wife how I feel she should be using a tampon. I’ll let you know what she says.
kitty-f*cker -8 1h6m
This is ridiculous
throwaway726274292 42 4h39m
(Sorry, I don’t know how to edit original post I’m new to Reddit)I’d just like to mention please keep the hateful “why would you marry this child” comments to yourselves. He’s a wonderful man and husband, and this was an issue that just got worse suddenly within the last few months when his depression got worse. He showers daily and does clean his junk thoroughly, but he gets really sweaty at work and is just sticky by the time he gets home
I’m not the type of person who beats around the bush, I always tell it outright like it is, but he isn’t always great when I try to have these conversations with him. He will just say “okay fine I’ll change” and that’s the end of it. And usually he does, but it’s just in a way that feels like it’s hurting him emotionally
Thank you all for the help. I did talk to him and he seemed embarrassed and said he will work on breaking these habits
sweaty-pajamas 22 5h21m
Your husband should probably switch to evening showering. I’m a contractor and evening showers are just a necessity in my line of work. Not really much point in showering in the morning when I’m going to go get hot & nasty at work. Shower after, then I go to bed clean!
tanis016 10 5h2m
Doesn't he shower after coming from work? I get sweaty after going to they gym so I shower. If I did something during the day that got me sweaty or was a really hot day once I'm home first thing I would do is take a shower.
ske3zy -2 5h28m
Most guys dont wipe their dicks after they pee.
Also, most guys sniff their balls.. We dont know why we do it but we do LMAO.
Tell him to take a shower before yall f*ck easy fix. These comments calling him nasty words are prolly women.. cause almost EVERY dude I know does these things.. The oral part I understand it is p gross having swamp dick.
butfirstaskreddit 33 2h21m
Girl why would you marry this troll.
CurvyKitten81 4 3h2m
Yep. I wonder if this is new behavior or if she just didn't notice before.
butfirstaskreddit 8 3h4m
This is 100% the sort of thing that should have been sorted before marriage...
CurvyKitten81 4 3h32m
Agreed
bigjack78 1 4h52m
There are many studies that show that when a woman falls out of love she begins to hate the man's smell. It was fine before when she loved him.
gingergirl181 0 4h59m
Because OP is either trolling or they're newlyweds and never had sex or lived together before marriage. I'm honestly inclined to believe the former because this kind of stuff doesn't just suddenly become gross and you definitely don't suddenly notice that your SO smells like piss only after you have been together long enough to marry.
headingintoparadise 26 2h55m
Question though. Do men not just shake it off after they pee? I always just assumed they don’t wipe the tip. Lol
No-Squirrel238 21 3h54m
Just speaking for me: it’s usually just a shake and/or squeeze. If you think about it, there is no toilet paper if you’re using a urinal. With the amount she’s describing he’s probably wrapping things up too quick. What’s left at the tip should generally be negligible.
Maybe TMI but there you go 🤣
headingintoparadise 7 4h3m
Hey thanks for answering! Not tmi at all; I asked! I’ve always thought what you described is what happens…but OP made me second guess myself lol
uniquehumannotabot 3 4h17m
Should note that even if it is a little bit, if it is that strong he is either dehydrated or needs to see a doctor.
Sadly some always seems to remain until you do something else and relax for it to "slip out".
Comyx 3 4h11m
I always use toilet paper, if possible after wetting it a bit when the restroom has both WC and sink close by.I never use urinals because of the lack of tp.
headingintoparadise 3 4h16m
I guess not surprisingly, every guy is different! My husband pees sitting down always lol.
Comyx 1 4h25m
Same here, if I'm home, or at my girlfriend's.I pee standing up when in foreign restrooms, basically.
onlykindasmart 1 4h54m
To be fair, that's a great way to pee. A little more trouble, but cleaner for everyone.
Fun-jellyfish22 1 5h24m
U taught him well
bigjack78 3 4h47m
I'd say almost no one uses paper considering urinals don't have paper and are in virtually all public bathrooms.
_ConstantVigilance_ 3 5h45m
I have never met a man who wipes after he pees. There’s a reason the urinals don’t have toilet paper next to them, you shake and then get the last drop in your underwear like a real man and you like it
GeauxAllDay 22 3h28m
Bottom line- gotta talk to him. 1 on 1. He may think you're joking with the "smells good" comment (some of us don't catch on very well and ya gotta tell us straight). He won't know it bothers you and he won't know to change till you do.
That being said, as a dude, there's a couple of things here that I'd like to offer some insight on:
- Pee shouldn't be dripping that bad. A good, firm shake should shake off any remaining pee. If there is a significant amount of pee coming out after he sheaths the sword, it may be a UTI thats trapping some in the urethra and gravity causes it to fall out when he relaxes (happened to me). Dudes shouldn't have any spots on the undies after picking up the pipe. IF there is, he's either not doing enough to clean it, or he may have a UTI. If he has a UTI, he'll need treatment, and he'll have to draw out the remaining pee before finishing and holstering his rocket.
- Some of us do the smelling thing inadvertently. I do. I hate it, but I do. I have bad ADHD and zero impulse control. Basically, I do the deed in one fell swoop before I realize what I've done and go "WTF why am I like this." This kinda has some benefit tho, bc smell can be an indicator of something wrong. All in all, it shouldn't be done in sight of others, especially if our spouses hate it.
- Ya man needs to bathe before you go down on him. That is a cardinal sin in the "Book of Brostm ". sh*ts gross af.
sassycritter235 8 4h3m
She also said she can smell the piss and sweat on his facial hair, so maybe that’s one habit he really should try to break…or at least be VERY careful not to touch his mustache.
GeauxAllDay 6 4h4m
I missed that part….
Mr_Donatti 16 2h59m
I don’t get the pee thing. I don’t know any guy who wipes his dick off. Is he doing something else I’m not quite understanding?
The scratching his balls and smelling them is an easy fix I would think. I would also think a quick shower before sex is an easy ask. You could even shower yourself as a “lead by example” thing.
_co_li_bri_ 14 2h24m
Seems a bit unfair about the toilet tbh. I mean… we women pee too and I’m sure a drop or two always stays with us taking our anatomy into account lolObviously sniffing hands after scratching his private areas is gross and gotta stop
CurvyKitten81 7 3h14m
Yeah, he's gross but it's not the pee drops. In a previous comment I mention that women have vagin*l discharge. I think neither causes a real problem for healthy individuals. The poor washing habits are the problem here. He's probably got several days worth of pee drops creating that aroma
_co_li_bri_ 1 3h42m
Yes definitely, good hygiene is the game changer, not the pee style
thisismyrealnamekz 4h29m
Most men will lie.. but nearly every male does the scratch and sniff, definitely not with piss dick tho. Why? No idea
jumbie7 13 5m
The things your describing are pretty normal for men, at least in my experience. However, what isn’t normal is that he lets it sit there and it makes him smell. My boyfriend does the same thing, but washes his hands and his junk before anything happens. I only ask because you didn’t mention it, but have you actually talked to him more than just in passing about your concerns? Maybe he doesn’t think you’re being serious? I know you ask him to wash up, but have you actually explained to him how unattractive you find his behavior and how it turns you off?
lituranga 13 2h4m
How the hell is it normal for men to have many drops of pee leak out of their dicks into their boxers/briefs every time they pee?! What kind of standards are these lol
IDontLieAboutStuff 17 2h25m
Have you ever seen a hose turn off? Its like that. Dicks are like pee hoses and even when you shut it off there's gonna be run off. Even if you shake and dab it with TP there might be some residual piss in your urethra and having a drop makes its way out an into your underwear isn't uncommon. You think men anywhere are wiping their dicks? This thread has shown me that many women do not understand how pissing as a man works.
lituranga 9 2h59m
Valid, I suppose many of us do not know. I still don't really get why men don't wipe their dicks though, that part makes no sense to me. Would it be okay for women to just drip dry and leave drops all the time into our underwear? I get that some drops you can't get and will leak later apparently, but at least some slight effort with a square of TP doesn't seem like a lot when you're in your own home.
I guess I am just appalled that you would not be able to notice yourself increasingly smelling like piss all day (especially as he does the scratch and sniff repeatedly) or care about that when your partner is trying to go down on you is really the appalling thing.
IDontLieAboutStuff 9 3h21m
I think you're drastically over estimating how much piss is still on your dick when you finish. Its INSIDE your urethra and as you readjust your dick some comes out. Usually after you've pulled your pants on and buckled you belt. Its a given. Theres not usually ANY pee left ON your dick. So wiping it doesn't do anything. For women your urethra sits behind the folds of the labia and when you urinate it is prudent to clean those folds. At least this is what I've always thought to be true. Correct me if I'm wrong?
lituranga 3 3h27m
You're right about that, gotta dab the folds.
I guess my mind is just being blown because in the past I don't find that men usually stink of piss by the end of the day so I'm just very confused haha.
IDontLieAboutStuff 3 3h37m
We don't stink of piss cause 1 drop 4-7 times a day and changing your clothes and showering ensures you don't end up smelling like piss. I suspect OP has a sensitive nose and a gross man lol.
CacaoCocoaChocolate 1 5h0m
OP mentioned her husband's depression getting worse recently, so I suppose it's more about him changing his underwear and taking showers regularly than about wiping habits, maybe?
bananawith3legs 2 3h46m
This isn’t a great comparison because women need to use toilet paper to prevent infection, men don’t have that same concern after urinating.
aj6787 2 4h10m
Three things…
Most men use a urinal in public, they don’t have toilet paper.
Unless you want us to get cuts inside there’s not much more you can do after shaking it a bit.
No one smells of piss from this. If you do, you have major health issues.
gestapolita 2 4h38m
Why in the hell would people without dicks know how pissing with a dick works unless someone with a dick told them? Were you born with the knowledge of how a period works? More pee does not leak out of a woman when she is done peeing, not even one drop, unless something is wrong.
IDontLieAboutStuff 2 4h58m
No but its like incredibly easy to find out both through education and life experience. Both of which seem to be lacking here. I learned how vagin*s work from the girlfriends I've had, the books I've read and the education I've been through. People who are sleeping together yet still are mystified by genitalia just (idk why at this point) surprises me.
aj6787 1 4h8m
Not only that but apparently the majority have never been in a serious relationship. Not a surprise when the top advice on this subreddit is always divorce.
abbier214 0 2h46m
Genuine question- can you not just wait until the last few drops come out?
IDontLieAboutStuff 6 2h54m
I mean you can sit and wait and sort of try to coax those last few drops from your urethra but its not like there's a set amount or feeling letting you know one more drop isn't going to come out. So you can do everything in manner that you are trying to make sure nothing else comes out and still a tiny bit comes out.
I'm led to believe the audience here is young. They haven't factored age into things. As you get older as a man urinary stuff becomes more... hit or miss I guess. I hit 30 and had urinary issues develop OPs BF has some other issues but he's getting older as a man and older people in general have incontinence issues.
CurvyKitten81 3 3h7m
I have two sons (9 & 18). I thought the drops of pee were normal. Women have vagin*l discharge in their panties. It happens. Very natural. Most people clean themselves at the end of the day so it's not an issue.
abbier214 2 2h58m
I see. Although I don’t think the big issue here is the pee, it’s the lack of hygiene after and lack of consideration for OP. The least he could do is wash his hands and have a clean down there before they’re intimate
IDontLieAboutStuff 2 3h0m
Oh I agree. Theres like way more issues than a drop of pee in your underwear here lol. How gross do you have to be to scratch yourself and smell it. No sane woman should put up with this regularly.
PeetSquared41 3 3h0m
Sometimes, a drop will come out minutes later, or if I go to sit down. It isn't everytime or even half the time, but it does happen. Dicks aren't always fun or easy to work with, lol! Of course, I shower before sexy time, especially when an oral session is coming my way!
Divine_Demigod 1 4h38m
With how much time I spend swiping through Reddit while on the toilet……no
Forreallife04 3 2h59m
….. you don’t know much about penises huh? There are even little dribbles of cum that come out after they org*sm, especially if you squeeze gently.
lituranga 4 3h6m
OK yes I get this, but I refuse to accept that what is happening to OP is some normal thing where all men end up with so much piss in their boxers/briefs by the end of the day that they stink like piss - that simply is not true and cannot be excused. If you are leaking that much out some effort needs to be taken to maybe use some TP, do the extra squeeze and shake, or SOMETHING to ameloriate this. I have never been with a man whose junk or underwear literally stunk like piss by the end of the day.
Forreallife04 2 3h42m
It’s possible, though, that OP is so disgusted by him that she’s either exaggerating or reality is being colored by her perception of how gross he is. Because all of what she described is pretty normal.
bigjack78 0 4h57m
Yeah sounds like a bunch of guys here are incontinent. No more than a drop should be left.
ske3zy 2 5h29m
Bruh we can’t help it.
BruisedKidneys 5 3h17m
Wait. It's normal for men to rummage around the front of their pants and practically smear it on their face? Why is this acceptable?
Beneficial_World699 12 1h55m
Are you worried about it will make him feel if you confront him seriously or have you done this and he’s simply not changing his habits?
Was it like this before you got married?
Does he work away from home or at home?
Does family and friends notice smells or have they said anything?
If you’ve already had a serious conversation with him and he’s still not making changes then give him some ultimatums, like no sex or let him sleep on the couch and tell him not to touch you. Alternatively, you can shower together to start before sex.
Tidalheat 10 1h47m
That's how men pee.
lituranga 18 2h5m
All men let pee leak into their boxers/briefs every time they go? Cuz I don't remember any of my past boyfriends smelling like piss all the time
im-acidic 6 2h8m
All men piss like this, but you definitely do the shake before you put jimbo away. What the OPs man does is not normal.
lituranga 2 2h12m
OK yes this is what I meant haha not the actual peeing but the after-shaking or making sure that you aren't leaking drops into your underwear.
IDontLieAboutStuff 2 2h21m
One single drop is acceptable. Any more and your man is a heathen and from the caveman times.
im-acidic 2 2h27m
Nah when you stand up and your bladder pushes out a whole ounce of piss, that's the worst.
im-acidic 1 2h21m
Lmfao yuppp
Lifekraft 2 2h14m
Yes but i would say it's reasonnable up to a certain amount. This is not a tap we can turn off. You can shake it and clean with a paper towel , there will still be few drop. The real question is why she see him piss. The guy is probably keeping the door open when he sh*t as well at this point. Also washing hand/ himself regulary seems to be the main problem there
ThrowAwayRubbish343 9 2h8m
I pat dry with tp, shaking it doesn’t do the trick
Obligation425 1 2h12m
Yes but he is doing It wrong, you dont just shake it you need to get some paper and clean the rest of piss or it is going to be like with her husband.
Itsabeemer 7 2h21m
Next time try to marry an adult.
kitchenvisit 7 4h57m
the bar is on the floor
KyMussler 5 4h55m
FYI to any men that don’t realize, when you scratch your balls and don’t wash your hands they stink from a distance too. My older brother has a habit of doing this and I can smell his hands from across the room. And the whole shake and put away thing is so nasty it makes my skin crawl.
moonraven33 4 2h30m
Tell him honey. One thing about us in this culture is we’re so afraid to tell the truth. You don’t have to be mean about it you can be loving and gentle and kind. But ultimately you’re not responsible for his feelings he is. Nobody is responsible for anybody’s feelings we are responsible for our own thank goodness. I don’t want anybody to have power over me in terms of my feelings. You just tell him you say honey I love you but I need you to know something I’m having a difficult time we talk about you and I was affecting you can you tell him that you love him you care about him but you need him to help you I need him to take better care of himself because it’s affecting your relationship it’s affecting your sex life and it’s probably affecting his health. And quite possibly could be depressed I don’t know that for fact I’m just speculating but maybe that’s something you should look at or talk about if in fact that’s the case. But you just talk about the truth. And it’s not always easy and it’s not always pretty and sometimes it hurts a lot of times the truth hurts but in the end if you’re willing to look at it and own it and hear it and sit with it and claim it to be ours it heals us. It’s sets us free. But too many of us aren’t willing to do any of that and so we turn our head and we lie and we talk behind peoples back‘s and we don’t listen and we plug her ears and we go Nana Nana Nana Nana Nana. And we live in deceit and lies and pretend worlds. And that’s too bad. Either one won’t live in that world. Not today and not tomorrow. I do wish you the best of luck I’m not saying this is gonna be an easy conversation because it won’t be it’ll be difficult but I believe you can do it I think in the end it’ll be good for both of you and for your relationship and just hold his hand and tell him you love him and you care about him and you miss him. You missed the man you married. Be gentle and kind show compassion and love that we are. Take care honey
bigjack78 4 4h49m
Hey, guys don't need to wipe their dicks. If this is just something that's an issue with your current partner then he may have a urological condition that is leading to him dripping extra. I can assure you your previous partners didn't do that either
SadShayde -1 5h7m
No. No, no, no.
NO.
Clean your dick on the regular, my guy. No girl likes to taste urine.
bigjack78 1 5h22m
That's not what I said.
Sapientslu*t 4 4h52m
I realized that I was getting UTI’s when my partners didn’t wash up immediately beforehand (they weren’t particularly gross or anything, I’m just very sensitive in that way). If you’ve had any health issues like that, I’d make that an ongoing rule.
Fun-jellyfish22 2 5h26m
Same
radiosushi 3 2h6m
Some guys don't take passive aggression seriously. He is one of them.
Tell him point blank how gross what he does is and how to remedy it.
Ogun_ 3 2h23m
Does he not shower?
pentasyllabic5 3 2h29m
Gotta tell him. He's a grown man. You shouldn't need to pull your punches here.
If you want to emphasize the point have him rub his hand all over his gentlemanly bits and slowly, one by one, lick his fingers clean. Or ask him to lick your butt after a soft poop. Or lick the toilet seat.
When he says "Hell No", say "Ok, well now you know how I feel..."
BlaqKoffee 3 2h37m
I just threw up in my mouth reading this... like I'm just curious how y'all even get to marry people who are this gross, that you're even scared to have grown up conversations with. How??? Smh I need to wash my eyes after what I've read 🤢
Larcztar 3 3h15m
How would I handle this? I would tell him no sex and kisses if he doesn't shower. I can't believe you went down on him. Use your words and tell him.
LetsssGooo 3 4h20m
Reddit posts be like "I just put a hamster up my husband's pee hole but how do I tell him he has something in his tooth"
cactuscat620 3 5h1m
I bought my husband a ball lovers kit and his game changed. It was never bad to begin with, but Ballsy activated charcoal wash is great. I also bought powder, and told him "this has saved my thighs, they never get sore anymore" and shinesty ball hammock underwear. "Its coming on summer and um, Im trying to help both of us not have swamp crotch. It happens to everyone but I dont know I think my sense of smell got more sensitive and I am having a hard time with intimacy"
Neochronic87 3 5h24m
I mean pretty much every guy does the shake after taking a piss. The smell youre describing definitely isn't from just that. I've never had this issue. It sounds like he's not washing properly when he takes a shower, or isn't showering often. Also, is he wearing the same underwear for days because unless he has some sort of medical issue, I don't understand how he manages to smell that bad doing what every other guy reading this does....
NutzoBerzerko 2 5h26m
No matter how much you shake and dance.The last two drops go in your pants…
karla-finn 3 5h29m
Good luck with your discussion! I had a situation with my previous partner. Not exactly what you're describing. It was his oral hygiene. For some reason he would only brush his teeth once a day. When we first got together he brushed his teeth in the morning, like a normal person. But then he would not do it at night. One night he came at me with his hands, beard and mouth tasting like Chipotle and onions (it makes me gag just thinking about it) so I told him straight up I'm not going to kiss you or have sex with you. So then he thought he'd get around this (after arguing with me that his dentist said he was doing fine.... Ummm are you trying to f*ck your dentist? No? Well...)So we started brushing his teeth before he came to bed, but then refused to do it in the morning. So he would just get up and go start the day with film on his tongue and sweaters on his teeth. Honestly the psychological aspect of it was so repulsive to me I never wanted him to touch me again. The crazy part of this is.... I'm still single a year and a half later, he started dating someone immediately. Sigh.
luckylexxi 3 5h33m
why did you get married to him
ExCatRep 3 5h33m
Well, I can tell you from very personal experience that this is unusual behavior for a man. Cuz I am one. And, many men would understand that. Does he perform oral on you? I'm quite willing to bet that your pieces and parts are a good example for him. Tell him you make the effort, you expect him to do the same.
Notin2022 3 5h39m
Unless he just started this habit why would date and marry him?
VegnCeleste 3 5h41m
Lots of nasty men in the comments 🤮🤮🤮
cincuentaanos 3 5h46m
And I don’t know how to bring it up without upsetting him.
Don't! Do upset him! You don't have to live this way!
FlowBot3D 2 1h32m
Different perspective: maybe he doesn’t have a very good sense of smell and you do. He thinks he is clean. Just tell him to wash his junk.
thunderingspaghetti 2 2h33m
Pee thing is normal, he needs to stop the sniffing thing 🤢 and only oral after a shower is my rule.
PabloCaeser 2 2h38m
Yeah so there's a few things here that haven't been considered, maybe he doesn't have a good sense of smell, maybe he doesn't realise how bad it is. Maybe he can't help it?
I have to shake, then gelq then wipe every time I pee because I dribble, sometimes Evan all that's not enough. It's not my fault either, I was injured in a car crash and tore all the muscles in my stomach and groin and it just happens now, kinda like some women have issues after pregnancy. It's incredibly embarrassing and I always worry if I'm wearing light trousers that they might stain. Though thankfully at least I don't smell.
My girlfriend also sometimes has issues after giving birth, but I certainly don't point it out, she has enough insecurities after it without adding something like that into the mix. We all pee from our sex bits. Every now and then someone might smell a wee bit. It's the cost of doing business. Maybe you're being a bit harsh, but if it's just a flat out hygiene issue then fair enough, but there are a few things to think about.
gestapolita 1 4h44m
That sounds very annoying and embarrassing. They make underwear for both men and women with waterproof lining in the crotch to prevent leak-through. Might get rid of that light pants worry for you.
Sensual_Dominance80 2 2h54m
So, I'm assuming you don't rim him?? Because wow, I bet that area is a whole other issue!!! I thought you were gonna say bad breath at first because many guys have horrible oral hygiene. But the drip drip from the pee pee it is. And to be honest, I don't know any guy that uses toilet paper rather than dripping dry. He sounds kinda like a slob. I bet it shows in other areas of his life as well if you look closely.
CurvyKitten81 1 3h19m
🤮
PeetSquared41 2 3h4m
Drops come out later, sometimes. It can be unpredictable too. I can even happen after a lot of shaking and a dab of TP. It is what it is. I'd also say women have a bit of leakage too. Nbd, humans are both hot and gross at the same time.
I do know that when oral is on the table, my GF and I start the foreplay with a little shower, so we don't really deal with the funk, that way. It may not be spontaneous, but we love knowing we are both clean and get into the build up, knowing what's ahead.
Natthealleycat 2 3h15m
Dear God some of you who are asking the men to "dab it with TP" have pretty obviously never been with a man before. They typically shake pretty good to get rid of it. The main issue I think OP is having is that he doesn't wash before they do the dirty/him scratch and sniffing his own junk. Those are gross, but I wonder how you got married without knowing this about him/not being mature enough to bring it up. My mind is just completely blown.
As for advice: just ask him to stop acting like his junk is a scratch and sniff sticker and tell him he needs to shower if you want to get intimate. If there's not enough trust for you to do this, then the marriage won't work. This is basic communication that is necessary to make any relationship work, let alone marriage.
CaseClosedEmail 2 3h21m
I feel like there is a post like this every single day and it starts to become kinda suspicious.
Every time they are already married
gingergirl181 1 5h3m
Yeahhhh, nobody in their right mind makes it all the way to marriage before something like this suddenly becomes an issue. Just a bit too sensationalistic and unrealistic. Props for the creative writing though.
cascad1an 2 3h23m
Just…. Lmao at the first part of this.
Asher_dragon_hatcher 2 3h32m
Honestly I don't know how frankfurters work but I thought that you're supposed to shake it. I've heard it never really all comes out. I can understand the scratching and sniffing thing is gross. Definitely should go somewhere to do that and shouldn't have to be told to wash his hands after. But really just talk to him about it. Sometimes people just do things not realizing it bothers other people and maybe no one has ever said anything to him about it.
Edit: I would also ask if he can wash properly or you guys won't be engaging in extra curriculars. Think about yourself Op That kind of behavior can get you sick.
SayYes_ToKetamine 2 3h35m
If you don't know how to communicate your wants and needs to your husband, then ya'll have a much bigger issue than his hygiene.
MF_Wings 2 3h39m
When he pees, he just shakes it off and puts his underwear back on
Uh, am I doing it wrong? What should I be doing after peeing and the customary shake?
sorry, adding just talk to the dude, tell him to clean up better, don't go down if he's got funk going on, I assume you wash up before he dives in, ask him to do the same.
Rune_202 2 3h47m
Yikes to be honest as a man myself I think I would just take what you say to heart asap just be very blunt with him, and tell him his habits are disgusting
Antz-da-man-76 2 3h49m
Tell him to get a fkn bath or a shower I don’t care if I’ve allready showered or some sh*t if I’m going to see my girl u best believe I’m having a deep clean anyway 😂
RobertElectricity 2 3h53m
Were you aware that he was gross before marriage, or did this crop up later?
IThinkaboutMore 2 4h0m
About the peeing issue, I am being completely serious here, what else do you expect him to do? Wipe it off with toilet paper? I have literally never known a single man who does so. They all just kind of shake it a bit then put it back, never noticed a problem with this causing a man to smell badly.
Euphoric_Safe 2 4h16m
has he always been like this??
r1otgurl 2 4h29m
This is like the opposite of a post that was exactly like this here last week lol.
Standard-Catch850 2 4h33m
I always wonder how these relationship reach to the point of marriage. How was this not seen prior??? Anyway I honestly don’t know if the advice I’m gonna give is what you’d want. But here goes: if I were you, I’d tell him he needs to start being clean, give him ONE day and if nothing changes we’d be getting a divorce. The fact that you had the stomach to put his dick in your mouth knowing all this is maddening to me
smrtboi84 2 4h35m
Homie I’m telling you right now the only strat is to be overly honest don’t even try to be gentle and not a big deal it won’t stick trust me I’m a dude with stanky friends you gotta let them know
Jacjjacksma88 2 4h40m
I am trying to figure out this is a problem now? He wasn’t doing this prior to the marriage?
bukkakejohn 2 4h41m
you know, i think im gonna go take a shower now. i hope your boyfriend does too
RedLipz1975 2 4h44m
Don’t give him oral… then when he asks why…!
captainbubbs 2 4h54m
I always shake a few times and tuck timmy back away....what would better my hygiene..? Do I need to douche my uretha every time I urinate? I'm confused.
SadShayde 2 4h55m
Gross.
My (least favorite) ex had breath that LITERALLY smelled like used kitty litter. Nasty.
katwithak82 2 4h59m
f*cking yikes.
"Yo babe, if you can smell your own dick, it's time to grab some soap."
I feel for you, OP.
the_hiding_lividus 2 5h9m
You need to have a conversation with him about these and find out if there's a reason he's letting his hygiene go. It could be stress or depression
TheBigZamboni85 2 5h13m
Be honest with him. I’ll grant you the scratch and sniff is weird, but pee dribble is pretty common. I can give my dick shaken baby syndrome but no matter what a drop always finds it’s way onto my shorts.
If I were you I’d just enforce a strict no sex until after a shower policy.
hailboognish99 2 5h23m
Just read this post to him damn.
That_Nerdy_Cat18 2 5h27m
You could offer to shower together if you're comfortable with that before intimacy. You could offer to do it for each other as some kind of foreplay as well. Hygienic and romantic if you like the idea!
Tamale_Loco 2 5h27m
You shake it once, that's fine. You shake it twice, that's okay. You shake it three times, You're playing with yourself again
zryan3564 2 5h31m
You need to just tell him. That's the only way you can get him to change. Communication is the key thing.
hannahsierra2017 2 5h32m
You just got to be honest with him about it
hdkb824 2 5h37m
There’s tips to the tinkle issue. As for the scratching, what’s worse is if he’s taken a sh*t during the day, he’s potential dealing with fecal too.
I think you just need to set the tone for how serious of an issue this is. At one point he was managing well enough that you went through with marrying him, but he’s lost focus of this.
curiouslyinclined 2 5h42m
I've learned that open, respectfully communicated, feelings, wants and needs is super healthy. It's hard to say something to your husband like "Your lack of hygiene is a physical and mental turn off for me. I want to be intimate with you and interested in you. Please address these things for me."
You think to yourself like wtf hubby! How are you not aware! Jeebus, wash your twig and giggleberries and stop with the scratch n sniff games, we aren't children anymore. And ffs wash your hands!
You probably never thought you'd have to even have this kind of talk with him but you're here so remember, he's your husband and you love him. Communicate with him and give him the opportunity to hear you and address your needs.
Good luck!
JustmeNicky 2 5h43m
Ok have to ask get your grossed out and man piss smells but when you say he pees just shakes it off and then puts his undies back on what are you meaning? Like are you expecting him to wipe the knob? I've literally never known of a male who wipes his knob I mean as a female even after I wipe my bits with toilet paper I'm certainly not delusional enough to think that bit of dried toilet paper cleansed all the urine or poop from my body parts.Sorry just had to ask as I'm wondering why you watch him pee so much and what your actually expecting when he takes a piss
wolfbane523 2 5h44m
Sometimes you have to use tough love and be brutally honest "babe if you want sex go shower and mage sure you wash your bits too"
imperfect-person 2 5h47m
Interact with me when she updates
GN_des 1 9m
I'm lead to believe he likes his smell if he keeps bringing his hand there. And avoids washing it off as best he can so he can keep doing this.
Either way there's no way this can ever be acceptable for you. Or none that I can see. And frankly, telling him to stop won't be enough. He'll find a way to do it so you won't notice most of the time.
This post made me sick just reading it, I'm not sure I wanna heat how long you'll need to remain in that situation. But it'd be a massive dealbreaker for me.
Thedelicatedonut 1 2h34m
I never and I mean NEVER want my wife to go down there and be turned off. I would be absolutely mortified! I always shower right before sexy time even if I already showered that day. Maybe thats what he can do?
Business_Loquat5658 1 2h51m
The scratching and smelling it thing kinda sounds OCD to me.
Some people dealing with mental health issues excessively wash. Others do the opposite (like with depression) and don't shower for days and days. I guess I would ask if you think he's depressed, or just icky.
Zeph19 1 2h57m
Most men shake it and its fine. If uncircumcised he may have to do it more because of the extra skin and squeeze out the rest.
Scratching is one thing (what guys haven't scratched the balls now and again). Putting his hands in his underwear and sniffing it is absolutely disgusting.
He needs a talk on general hygiene. Specifically mention what you have stated here and tell him he needs to stop this behavior.
If you go down on him despite him continuing to do so in the future, that would unfortunately make you the enabler to his unhygienic habits
ffffk55 1 3h4m
my ex was the same Dx it was a 1 month old relationship... one day she told me "you don't even go down on me anymore.." and in my head i was like "bitch why would I? ur dick literally smells like pee" but i just brushed it off.. and broke up w him for another reason shortly after it.. We were both 21 at the time... but i know that i will never ever tolerate a man baby who doesn't take proper care of himself. If you want people to go down on you make your dick don't smell like pee? i mean if we're outside etc it can be excusable but we're literally in each others places, you have your own bathroom and you don't even prepare yourself for your partner and let your dick smell like pee. ew
macsquoosh 1 3h6m
He sounds rather weird scratching his nuts and sniffing his fingers ...
PartOfTheTree 1 3h9m
Just show him this post
uhhhhh_iforgotit 1 3h12m
I have an agreement with my friends. Tell me if I smell so I can do something about it. And I do the same. It's a courtesy
This is him being a twatwaffle. Tell him to get his sh*t together or else you'll come up with a creative convincing punishment or no sex or whatever. Guys need to learn proper hygiene too. If he refuses... Tell him this is a deal breaker for you
Sudden_Cabinet_1479 1 3h23m
Everyone is saying this is normal but the reeking of piss thing isn't exactly normal is it? If most guys don't smell like a urinal there's clearly a way to avoid it. You don't have to be mean about it but you can't say nothing
dutchman76 1 3h30m
You should be able to tell him that he smells and that it's a turn off, you don't have to be mean about it. It's ok to hurt his feelings if you're not doing it on purpose, but you should be able to voice your concerns, if you can't communicate, the relationship is doomed anyway.
if it started after you got married, I wonder if he's trying to get you to divorce him on purpose.
LavenderSage013 1 3h34m
Time to order him a manscaping kit and to be brutally honest
earthgarden 1 3h40m
How do these dirty men get women in the first place, let alone get one to agree to marry them?? I mean any dude reading this who struggles with women, have hope because if this pig managed to get a wife anyone can.
erinnsong 1 3h40m
Agreed with everybody here that you definitely need to just be straightforward and have a talk with him about it. But also, don’t forget that he’s someone you love so maybe just remind him of his good qualities at some point during the conversation. It might be embarrassing for him to hear this stuff. Good luck to you!
Character-Remote7354 1 3h42m
There is no good way to resolve this. Personal hygiene, affects the offender and those around having a negative impact on everyone's physical and mental health. It can't be ignored. What feels worse than the hygiene problem, is being put into the position of having to tell them. I was a Senior NCO in the military and from time to time I'd have to sort out a dude (it's almost always f*cking men). I hated doing it. At first I'd beat around the bush. I learned that doesn't work. You don't have to be jerk, but you can still be direct- which is best. Like this; "hey listen, you stink, your body, your clothes, your breath, they all smell bad. I want you to shower every day, change and wash your clothes, and brush your teeth at least twice a day." You don't like to do it like that, but you need to be clear what it is that's wrong, and what they need to do to fix it. Because it's embarrassing, they are going to be insulted anyway. the emotional response to this is not great. That's why the need to be direct without being mean.
You would be right to be frustrated with having to tell an adult this. I feel your pain.
Spode7 1 3h43m
Buy some Dr. Squatch natural soap and then show him the commercials on line and see how he reacts then.
DStachelski 1 3h43m
A lot of men become lazy after getting married. They think just because they have a wife now, it means they can become a slob and it won’t affect their marriage. And then they wonder why their wife no longer wants to become intimate.
Lovelyone123- 1 3h44m
Gross 🤢🤮
Desertdwella1776 1 3h45m
This is literally many many dudes. We ALL have after piss drippage. And we all sniff our fingers. Maybe the “hygiene” is masking a larger issue ?
PsychologicalSell805 1 3h50m
You just have to tell him! If you have a good relationship you can do it in a fun way and he will respond accordingly. If my hubby smells then I tell him and vice versa and we just laugh about it. If he respects your relationship he will hate that he’s doing something that turns you off. Could you make it playful and maybe suggest a shower together?
venbalin 1 3h51m
He could probably stand to clean himself more and freshen up before expecting you to be touching each other but I don’t think there’s a way to stop men from instinctually and sometimes immediately sniffing our hands after touching something gross but you’d think he’d be familiar enough w/ his dick smell
-Skelly- 1 3h51m
If he wants to be gross he can be single. If youre gonna be gross, be gross in private & dont subject other people to your gross
TheBullMoose1775 1 3h52m
I am a man, and to address all the men in the comments, no not all of us do this nasty sh*t.
swingset27 1 3h53m
You have to summon some adult backbone and tell the man that his hygiene needs to change for the better.
I mean, obviously, don't do it in anger or disgust. Choose a time when the mood is neutral and preface it by saying that you love him and that you're not trying to embarrass or humiliate him, but it's an issue and important.
He can handle it like an adult, and change, or not. Then, you make your decision about it based on that and what follows.
crossikki 1 3h57m
Outright tell him. My husband shakes and pops it back in. I straight up said if you want me to put it in my mouth you run it under the tap after you pee. He said ok. Everyone's happy.
He doesn't scratch and sniff though that's just grim...
opentill6am 1 4h10m
Does he climb on sink to rinse or do you have a small sink? Seems like a good idea but there's no way we could reach our faucet just standing infront of it.
crossikki 1 4h14m
That made me laugh. We have a pretty low sink so I think he stands on his toes and it can reach. But now I'm thinking about it Ive never seen him do it, so I'm not sure of the technicalities. I'm going to need to see a demonstration in the morning.
eldenchain 1 4h3m
Also: "Shower or no oral" is absolutely fair.
pupperzforlife 1 4h4m
I told my husband as soon as we started dating before we even had sex that it HAD to be clean down there. I am super lucky (/s) and get UTI’s easily. He always makes sure it’s clean. It’s not just about being turned off by it, it’s a health issue.
WatercressSea9660 1 4h5m
If you're worried about hurting his feelings or anything...start taking him to the shower before sexy time. Then you know the things you want clear, will be clean. You can even wash his beard and tell him how great he smells.
petal_vento 1 4h9m
I am about to vomit just by reading your post. 🤢
ATRward 1 4h11m
Lol, this is every guy ever, too funny
lildegenerate19 1 4h13m
That’s disgusting 🤢
truecrimefanatic1 1 4h16m
Yeah it's time for a sit down because random comments aren't doing it and he clearly is gross and doesn't care about it to do it on his own.
isaiah5417 1 4h23m
🤮. Why do men do this? They act like showering or even wiping their own f*cking genitals is impossible. I had a breif 2 week relationship with someone who refused to shower, and ruined sex with his stench. It was so bad, he even kept saying "sorry I stink so bad babe". Don't be sorry motherf*ckers. TAKE A SHOWER, BRUSH YOUR TEETH, WIPE YOUR PEENS AND ASSHOLES. It's not hard.
beccam12399 1 4h24m
ugh. my bf does the shake thing too and sometimes there’s some leftover that leaks out a second after he puts his underwear back up……. men, WHY are you so opposed to using TP. I don’t understand
uniquehumannotabot 1 4h53m
Doesn't matter, in reality it's a bloody hose. While the tip might be dry, as soon as you get up and move around, things will slowly work their way out.
PrisonaPlanet 1 5h3m
I like how women complain about men not knowing about female anatomy and then I read stuff like this lol
beccam12399 2 5h5m
how does using TP to wipe your dick instead of shaking have anything to do w anatomy. is it literally biological that you have to shake your pee off your dick? i’m saying why can’t y’all use TP to wipe the pee off instead of shaking. it’s disgusting and gets pee everywhere. go off tho king lol
PrisonaPlanet 1 5h9m
I’ll wipe my penis with toilet paper when you get around to installing TP at all the urinals in the world. Also our urethras don’t have these liquid tight seals that close up after we pee. I would wipe my dick like your suggesting when I was at work because I wore khaki pants and the liquid spots would show up, I would also sit to pee to avoid any splash back, and sh*t would still leak out into my underwear, it’s just a flaccid muscle with stagnant liquid in it that can dribble out. Go off though queen.
Lolaaaaaa 1 4h27m
If I get grossed out going down there we just laugh it off and stop or go wash up
Lay-Z24 1 4h31m
ahh the age old scratch and sniff
Throwawaygirl409 1 4h32m
There’s no nice way to say it. He is your husband and if you want him to get the message you got to say it how it is, he needs to feel a type of way in order to do something about it, otherwise he won’t see how much it’s actually bothering you and just probably ignore you
ChampionSwimmer2834 1 4h32m
My current partner’s ex apparently used to stink up their bed and my current bf was forced to kick them off because they’d refuse to do anything about it. Not even put on some deodorant
Alternative_Yam8427 1 4h32m
Again I ask, Why people get married anymore.
ProllyLolly 1 4h34m
I literally told my SO that his bad hygiene could cause me to get yeast infections, UTIs, etc., so if he wants to get intimate he HAS to bath and brush his teeth, first. He respected me enough to improve his bathing habits for my sake.
Lay-Z24 1 4h35m
am i the only one who thinks this isn’t that weird? (except for the not cleaning up before oral), every guy i know just shakes it off, a few drops always hit your undies because sometimes a couple drops are inside your urethra and comes out a later. the scratch and sniff is something i’ve heard countless guys do, i thought it was pretty normal for guys to do that because i’ve never heard anybody call it disgusting? isn’t it the same thing if he called her vagin* disgusting and smelly?
Basic_betty2021 1 4h35m
I left a 9 year relationship last year and his hygiene had been a major issue about 7 of those years. He had his reasons, which I understood to a point but eventually it just led to resentment on my end. It became a huge turn off to beg him to shower so we could be intimate. Ultimately, it wasn’t what caused our divorce but it was something that became an issue and affected us deeply.
I would have a come to Jesus chat with him and really express how it makes you feel. It may not be easy for him to hear, but if he’s not taking care of himself and can’t learn to do that, it might not be the best situation for you.
TheCatsPajamasboi 1 4h36m
Pee drips from male genitals the same that women have discharge pretty regularly, it is just a part of the anatomy. I wouldn't get into a tizzy about that. The refusing to wash his junk before oral definitely sounds frustrating. I hope open communication works for you. Maybe he can keep hand sanitizer around for after he does a scratch and sniff, that way you guys can compromise a little on something?
Material_Indication1 1 4h38m
I have seen a lot of this "how can i tell my wife/husband" . I don't understand this, if you are married isn't it you become one? You finish each others sentences, you are comfortable with each other. Maybe it just baffles me, because me and my husband are just "hey you need to shower, you stink! Or you are not getting to bed when you havent showere. Sometimes even say no you are not kissing me, your mouth stinks, go brush it first. Isn't this how marriage is? Your husband is the closest you can get to a person physically. So what is the probelm?
Cutiebeautypie 1 4h39m
tinysandcastles 1 4h41m
This is gonna sound really f*ckin weird but i like when i blow a guy and the first little bit of precum is mixed with the last little trace of piss so it tastes kinda saltier than the rest. Same thing happens if they have to take a sex break to pee. I love it.
Grand_Impression_746 1 4h43m
Leann Kreischer?
KingCurry01 1 4h45m
I mean its a general problem in public that they don't put tissues or toilet paper next to or near urinals, but he shouldn't be putting his hands down there without washing his hands.
EyeLeft3804 1 4h48m
Is it more important that you protect his feelings or your health and hygeine? I think you should reprioritise, you don't have to be rude about it, but if he's reasonable he should be on a similar page to you. And if he currently isn't then you're allowed to protect your comfort.
Vaerii541 1 4h53m
shower with him
TrophyCow 1 4h58m
Yoooo that's terrible, lol how did he interpret wash up as mouth wash, this is random but I never go down on my boyfriend or else his had a bath relatively soon to the time and it's not even for selfish reasons because I know that if I have a single bad experience I will literally never go down on him again so I am honestly doing it for him, you just gotta tell him, I need you to have a bath before we can do this or I can do that, and also you just have to tell him straight up even if it hurts his feelings or sit him down Carefully have the conversation with him, depending on the type of man you have but you should just do it you're obviously growing resentment for him so with the love you still have for him just do it for his own good and tell him
PrisonaPlanet 1 4h58m
How many grown adult men in this world are just not washing their junk/hooch/ass crack area? Is it really a common thing that guys don’t clean down there? I’m a guy and pretty much for as long as I can remember bathing myself I have taken care of those areas just as much if not more than the rest of my body. I’m pretty hairy too so I could only imagine how disgusting it would be if I didn’t lol
Auxiliumusa 1 5h12m
Teach him the post gonadal milking technique
ResistAlternative935 1 5h12m
Thanks OP, I've seen numerous times my bf scratched as well and it always urked me and i also tell him passive agressive remarks haha but now i can't help but be utterly disgusted thinking exactly your thoughts that are totally right = his hands are dirty and then his face as welland i also have to tell him to go wash his hands.Now i am just angry, he's 34 yo!??!! Why have i to ask him that as if he were my child
Us, women deserve so much better 😔🤌
Wsyddd 1 5h12m
Tbh just be straight up, “bae you f*cking stink“ however he takes is his problem 🥰💖
dcking12 1 5h15m
That reminds me of my girlfriend kinda she's clean as far as hygiene but when she showers she doesn't scrub or use a rag just wipes down with soap and rinse not too big a deal but still you don't always get all dirt off without scrubbing, also when we eat she's messy and then her cats always come sit right next to her wich she pets then goes back to eating that's not the worse the worst is after she eats she licks her fingers and hand like she's starving or slobbing on a dick it's very off putting am I being too judge mental because I don't like animals near my food or is it her lack of manners because she never had a family to teach her proper ways of doing things
Filadono 1 5h15m
Kyle!
Mycofenolate_mofetil 1 5h15m
You'll just have to tell him. He'll probably be upset but you have to insist. Eventually he'll understand.
Mycofenolate_mofetil 1 5h16m
And when he is clean, give him a blow j*b. Positive reinforcement is better than negative.
forestapee 1 5h19m
A different angle: has he always been this way? If it's a fairly new development he may be suffering from depression, as a lack of motivation for self care
Xbox3523 1 5h22m
Are we married to the same man?
Waste_Jellyfish_841 1 5h34m
Tell him he’s a gross c*nt
Vitaloss 1 5h37m
Play the song “if you must - Del The Funky hom*osapien” nonstop until he changes
almeapraden 1 5h42m
Honestly this is a huge dealbreaker. You’re not his mother. This is a hill to die on.
Gravity_falls549 1 5h46m
I agree the best thing to do is be blunt and honest. That’s the only way he is going to get it through his head and change his habits.
I’m sorry you have to go through that, most men have better hygiene etiquette than that
tradersy95 0 3h1m
Dam i feel called out.
Weird-Process5843 0 3h17m
Divorce. You’re old enough to know to expect basic hygiene from a “man”. I used to date someone (my 1st boyfriend), in my early 20s, 20-25 (off and on) and he rarely ever brushed his teeth. or showered regularly. Fkking disgusting. IDK why i tolerated it for so long- oh yeah, he was my first bf and i had abysmal self esteem.
You deserve better. A grown man who is disgusting is just… pitiful. I wonder if this man(child) was your first bf too?
theudoon 0 3h37m
I'm just amazed you got far enough to find out what it tasted like at all, honestly. One whiff of his unwashed piss-stick and I'd just tell him no, not happening. There is just no way I'd get to the point of putting it anywhere near my mouth. Or my body in general until he learns how to wash like a normal person. Maybe you just need to blast his nasty ass down with a garden hose until he learns, idk.
For real though, him not washing, other than just being straight up disgusting, he can also give you downstairs problems from his germ-covered dribblepole, you can get all sort of fun things like UTIs, BV, or yeast.
gaylesogay 0 3h45m
Every time he puts his hands down his pants, tell him to wash them. Other than that, file for divorce. He's an adult!
Cine_Jon 0 3h49m
What? Lmao this is literally just how every human man lives. This is a confusing post. With the pee especially you are asking too much, the penis is a long tube and the pee is stored in the shaft so it’s impossible to get it all out in the bathroom.
Interesting_Ear_s 0 4h12m
A man who thinks being dirty is being a man is just a lazy baby boy, Don’t ask him to change, that makes him more resistant, Tell him your boundaries & what you need, tell him when he’s clean it makes you happy, Tell him you want him to be clean, Shoot him some ask Steve show stuff, or whatever that is all over Youtube talking about men’s cleanliness,
And leave him be, basically tell him if he cares about you he’s wanna respect that, also be clean and have good times together or he may as well hangout with like minded ppl
Stick to your boundary, be patient and not aggressive, just consistent, also make it clear it’s a no compromise soruation.
AA0754 0 4h12m
This is why in my culture we use a bidet/lota.
Good riddance.
rossdyer333 0 4h25m
No prostate no opinion.
rossdyer333 0 4h26m
No prostate no opinion.
XxThrowawayxX-_- 0 4h40m
Ehh the older I get the more I see all men do this. It's just a man thing. I don't get it, but it's just men. I was turned off and still am to a degree, but I'm learning to live with it.
southpawsermon9 0 4h42m
Alright this is what you do, next time y'all are having sex, halfway through you just start peeing on him
tellmeimgoingcrazy 0 4h58m
How are guys not embarrassed by being like this? Too many guys do this and are just fine with being that way. A lot of women ignore it when going down because they don’t want to embarrass the guy but if a woman had a smell they are the first to point it out and usually in a rude way. (Not based on experience because I have not actually Ben with many men but heard stories)
presidentdrumf 0 4h59m
Film himI bet he's unaware of his habits
BlkLunaLovegood 0 5h4m
“Babe, I love you but your junk stinks. Dabbing some TP on the tip of your dick won’t kill you, but if you don’t start paying more attention to your hygiene… I will. 😐”
fkndsfslnd 0 5h8m
For all the guys: it takes less then a minute to take paper and/or water to wash your dick. It makes everyone happy. Even your dick. OP that is gross and yea good communication leads to good hygiene and a better sex life, or I would bet on it at least.
burntoutgrace710 0 5h19m
I truly don't understand why I see these types of posts so often about spouses. Partners? Sure. Fiances, even. But spouses? Why do people so frequently not know these things about their significant other until after marriage? Do the unhygienic partners put on a cleanly facade?
Personally I couldn't do this and if my partner, after multiple interventions, continued being so blatantly unhygienic, I'd simply leave. But now you're married so we'd be talking divorce and that's typically not easy.
And quite frankly I sincerely hope you don't allow anyone to convince you that not wanting to touch someone covered in their own urine is you somehow being in the wrong. No, it's unhygienic and you shouldn't disrupt your hygiene for someone else.
Maybe he can find someone with a piss kink if a serious talk doesn't work out.
Kipapuro 0 5h21m
That's Gross, where I come from it's a strict tradition to wash your private parts with water after finishing the business at WC. I am not claiming this practice is the best or something as one might claim this isn't sustainable use of water and hygiene depends on the person I guess, yet I find our practice cool every time I go down on someone as they don't smell pee or something, and OP will be out of trouble if it was that way. Yet we have our sh*t with regards to hygiene, plus it's a personal issue
Flimsygoosey 0 5h23m
Run qweeen runn
amygoodman03 0 5h28m
Seriously f*cking gross.
Vegan_Knight215 0 5h29m
“Hey, not wiping your dick post piss, scratching and sniffing it and then trying to touch or kiss me makes me dry up like a desert. Can you stop being such a slob and get better hygiene please? The idea of kissing you or being intimate with you repulses me right now”
Sounds harsh but like getting it out is always good imo
R_Amods 5h47m
This post has reached one of our comment/karma limits. The text of the post has been preserved below.
Throw away account for obvious reasons. My (27f) husband (28m) has some hygiene habits that are really becoming vile and off putting to me. And I don’t know how to bring it up without upsetting him.
(I have brought these things up to him here and there, but he never really acknowledges it or tries to change.)
When he pees, he just shakes it off and puts his underwear back on, and pee always drips out into his underwear. As you can imagine, throughout the day he does this and pee is spreading all over his bits every time this happens, and I think it’s disgusting.
To make matters worse, he has this habit of constantly sticking his hand down his shorts, scratching his junk and then SNIFFING it. It is absolutely disgusting to me, because now that dried piss and sweat from the day is all over his fingers and now potentially on his face and it makes his beard/mustache smell too
The idea that he is touching me or kissing me is so disgusting now.Whenever I see him do this, I ask him if it “smells good?” And then I tell him to go wash his hands because he’s being disgusting
Also, the last time we had sex, I went to give him oral and I almost puked because his d*ck tasted like piss and sweat (mind you before getting hot and heavy, I asked him to go wash up and all he did was use mouthwash)
How would you guys handle this? I can’t tolerate this anymore Thanks in advance for any help and advice
Ermmahhhgerrrd -1 2m
Has he always been this way? Depression will affect hygiene and so will laziness.
throwaway726274292 10 3m
He does have depression, but these are habits he’s always had and it’s seem to have gotten worse over the last few months
bigjack78 1 4h58m
Sounds like he has incontinence and needs to see a doctor. No shame, something is wrong with his body.
Ermmahhhgerrrd 0 5m
How does he react when you tell him that he's gross? Because that is very gross. If he doesn't seem to care, it very well could be from depression. Anything out of the norm the last few months with him? Does he take medication for his depression?
Moose0801 -1 2h35m
I either use toilet paper or wash it. I've literally heard so many women make this complaint. Just clean yourself... It's not hard
CombOne7189 -1 3h17m
Divorce, you deserve better than this Orc, yuck!
kayaedengreen -1 4h27m
Seems like a normal male thing to ball scratch and not something you can really prevent… sounds like you’re just starting to resent him now, but I would just tell him honestly how you feel in a calm way and suggest trying new methods or products to make it more enjoyable of an experience.
Most people let themselves go when in a depressive state though so that’s important to understand and consider his side or reasoning, even if he has none. Most people don’t know they have a problem…
kayaedengreen -1 4h31m
Also everything mentioned is absolutely normal male activity and it sounds like you may not be attracted to men haha. Joking, but seriously give him a break. The only solution I see here is to tell him to wash his privates before oral or sex and that’s the end of it… who cares otherwise. Literally all men wiggle their piss off and get it on boxers and ball scratch… I’m just confused why he needs to change his natural habits?
kayaedengreen -1 4h35m
I’d also like to mention that most men aren’t taught proper hygiene… all children for that fact… but a penis is like a hose so even if it gets wiped or rinsed more can come out 5-10 mins after going. Maybe tell him to squeeze it all out at the end? Not much you can do to change their bodily functions and needs… balls are itchy af. You should offer to scratch them for him and he’d probably take you on a vacation getaway lmao.
boredinthemnts -1 4h29m
Trust me I get it!! My husband only shower like 2 times a week. Thank God he sleeps on the couch, due to sleeping issues he has. But due to this his underwear smells like urine alot of the times if he doesn't shower before we are intimate.He also chews tobacco and smokes weed. I'm not against either but his breath smells so bad. Honestly like a dirty butthole. It's so gross. He uses mouthwash before we are intimate but just to kiss him goodnight is like 🤢And his beard and body just stink like sweat. Not really a bad b.o. but almost like morning breath. I never say anything because I don't want to hurt his feelings but like you I am less and less turned on by him. I don't like to be kissed or touched by mine either much anymore. Your doing the right thing but reaching out and asking for advice! Wish you the best OP. Your not alone!!
PrisonaPlanet 2 5h1m
My god I feel bad for you, I don’t mean to be insulting but your husband has the bathing habits of a small child and that’s putting it nicely lol if it truly does bother you like you say then maybe hurting his feelings might be the wake up call he needs to change?
TheSnipeyBoi -1 4h36m
YTA, his co*ck his rules
CryptoKing-NY -1 5h18m
Does he eat you out? vagin*s can be vile as well. Most likely you are looking for any excuse to get out and do the dirty deed with someone else. Be honest. Tell him to shave, wash, and be clean if he expects you to give him head or sex.
Ghostradamus -1 5h43m
Just start liking pee
LeatherEvening7437 -2 2h3m
he has fimosis, tell him to get cirsuncised.
doesitaddup -2 2h15m
" I can’t tolerate this anymore"
break up
Renots123 -2 2h54m
Haha either you are very sensitive or he needs to change his diet/ shake better
Men shake after peeing, thats all we do. Ever. Sometimes dribbles hit underwear. And every EVERY guy scratches his balls and probably smells it after. We like our own stink. So either you are being ridiculous or he has serious diet problems that cause really smelly sweat.
Does he shower everyday?
First_Rose_Princess 14 3h11m
Or he f*cking stinks and needs to wash his dick once in a while. Sounds like you do too. Stop gaslighting OP
Nicktarded 2 5h2m
I am very hygienic and typically smell very good. My girlfriend even complements my hygiene, and I still do most of it. The key is that I don’t smell bad. OPs husband needs to shower more, the problems he’s facing with smelling like piss is not normal. Pee dropping into underwear and smelling after scratching are totally normal.
hannahdem96 0 5h38m
I agree with you but this isn't gaslighting
Renots123 -5 3h15m
I shower minimum twice a day thank you. I smell fantastic.
Efficient-Coconut794 2 3h8m
Pretty much every woman I know admits this as well, so it’s not even that weird
WannaCommentOnePost -1 5h37m
Nah speak for yourself. Not hard to take a single piece of toilet paper and wipe your dick off. It even takes less time than shaking it.
jeddeddiah -2 4h52m
He's a retardDitch him.
SadShayde 2 4h54m
It's 2022. You can stop using that word anytime, now.
SpecialistDesk9297 -3 2h34m
Divorce
falllinemaniac -3 3h49m
It's a wife's duty to make him the man he can't be on his own. A nice but sharp criticism on piss dribbles and public presentation should get him in line, particularly if he's not getting any more BJs. Incentive would help.
There's a risk of coming off as nagging but one must face some risks.
PrisonaPlanet 1 5h5m
She’s his wife, not his mommy. She is under zero obligation “make him a man”.
sithbaby -5 32m
My partner does the same thing when it comes to peeing. Honestly, the only way I’ve gotten through to him is being annoying about it. Literally constantly saying something when I see him go into the bathroom. It’s annoying as hell, I get it, but like you I don’t want to be giving a blowj*b to someone who has pee in their underwear.
I’ve also started slamming the toilet bowl lid down whenever he leaves it up. Maybe I’ll get my point across one day.
IDontLieAboutStuff 3 2h30m
No. You will not. Not if you've told him multiple times directly and he doesn't listen acting like somehow you're gonna get the point across by other means like slamming the toilet seat, isn't gonna work. If he doesn't listen about basic sh*t what happens when you have a baby and a mortgage.
CurvyKitten81 1 3h28m
I have a man, a baby and a mortgage. Sometimes the man forgets and leave the toilet sea up. He's still remembers to feed, change, play with and pick up the baby from daycare. He also pays the mortgage on time every month.
Forgetting little things does not mean that he'll forget the big things. It just means they aren't as important to him.
IDontLieAboutStuff 1 4h13m
It was less about the toilet seat and more that she feels he doesn't listen. The toilet seat debate is a weird argument. That I down really agree with..
uniquehumannotabot 2 4h42m
NGL, but if my significant other slammed things to try and get a point across I'd tune things out too.
CurvyKitten81 1 5h6m
I agree, but it feels like there's no room for discussion. Her way is THE way. No compromise. This will set the tone for the whole relationship.
I like the seat down. He likes it up. No big deal at this point. Pointless to argue.
sithbaby 0 2h50m
So I should ask him to put the toilet seat down before I use the bathroom?
And luckily I don’t want children.
gestapolita 3 4h49m
Yes, you should ask him. The standard in my house is to put the lid down before flushing. That goes for everyone; there’s a vinyl sticker under the lid that says “Put me down” so even guests know.
ApartmentUnfair7218 2 1h13m
maybe you can ask him put it down every time he leaves it up so he’ll start doing it on his own
sithbaby 1 2h27m
I always mention it to him when he leaves it up but I ain’t peeing without the toilet seat down.
skwerldom 4h57m
Yeah, guys (and people in general)who put their hands in their pants or use the bathroom or pick their noses without washing their hands are just gross.
